How many times have we said, “I want someone to love me for what and who I am?” Many throw out phrases “my better half, they put up with me,” or my favorite, “they complete me.” But why would we want to be anything less than the best for the one we love? Why would you want your loved one to have the increased pressure to complete you? Shouldn’t you strive to be complete for the ones you love?
I understand. Relationships are a team sport. But teams are only as strong as the weakest player. In order for strong relationships, we need to be strong individuals. If you or your partner’s weaknesses over shadow the strengths, can you imagine that stability of your relationship?
The responsibility for love and relationships start with YOU. If you continually date losers, I hate to suggest there might be something about you that is attracting losers. If you’re constantly focusing on fixing or changing your partner, perhaps you need to take a look in the mirror. You need to focus your effort on becoming a winner.
And in being a winner, I am not suggesting you try to mimic supermodels or successful studs. You don’t have to be rich, or give mega-money to charities. These things although good, can be very superficial. Often times what we see on the outside is masking weakness on the inside. You have to be your best inside and outside. Below are just a few suggestions on how to get into champion form.
1. Strive to be fit and healthy. You won’t just look good, you’ll feel good. You don’t have to be a hot chick, or a stud with six pack abs, but wanting to look your best shows you care about yourself. And if you care, others will follow. If you don’t care about yourself, why should other people?
2. Work on your own individuality and independence. One of the greatest downfalls of relationships is lack of independence – fear of being alone. Find confidence in your own presence. Have the courage to spend quality time alone. You’ll be surprised what you learn about yourself.
3. Learn to be self reliant. We all desire someone to lean on, support us and take care of us – but too much of this could cause us to be clingy and needy. You should try to want to lean on someone, not need to learn on someone. There is quite a huge difference. And if have too much need and codependence that could be a heavy burden for our loved one. Sooner or later, they will tire and move on.
4. Have a positive attitude about everything, even when having a bad day. Holding onto negative emotions and attitudes is a complete downer for any relationship. If you are unhappy, honestly ask yourself why. The answers lie within you, not anyone else.
The bottom line is to be a winner in love the odds are a lot better if you become a champion contender. If not, you may make it to the winner’s circle of marriage, but will it be successful and happy?
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