In today’s dating climate, speed could refer to a variety of different themes. Speed dating for one is a system in which one believes they can find their soul mate or life partner within two minutes. Now I admit, I have fallen in love at first sight. But to be frank, love at first sight never guarantees a long term relationship. Basically, what you are determining in those two minutes is if you can see yourself having sex with that person. Sex is not love, and offers no bearing on the quality of your relationship.
We are without a doubt, a society driven by sex and we like things fast – fast money, fast cars, fast woman/men. If it doesn’t happen fast, our short attention spans move quickly to someone else who catches our eye. Three dates and people plan moving in together, six months we start talking marriage, two years later – married and a bundle on the way.
Maybe in a superficial, insecure world this is how to maintain a relationship –secure it before anyone thinks about it. Seal the deal, before we actually place any bets. We rush into marriages and then wonder why so many end up in quickie divorces.
Just because the relationship is moving fast, doesn’t necessarily mean you have picked a winner. In a horse race, it is true the fastest horse wins the race, but within that one race there are different measures of the horse’s speed. It is similar case for our many of us run relationships.
1. Fast start – You and your lover hit the ground running at record speed – love and passion. You simply cannot keep your hands off each other. Oh joy; it must be love (Its lust). But soon you it the corner and the speed slows and sometimes come s to a complete halt. Going too fast out of the gate may cause the relationships to run out of gas.
2. First turn – You’ve managed to keep the fire burning through the first turn. Although the flames have subsided, you have enough stamina to keep up with the race. You have found there is more to your relationship than passion – you share a common bond, friendship and trust. And you actually enjoy each other’s company outside the bedroom. But the true testament of the relationship is at the next turn.
3. The back stretch – The relationships slows and questions mount? Do you and your mate have what it takes to make it to the finish line? Is this truly the person you want as a life partner? You make the major mistake of checking out the other horses. Is there something better? Fatigue is begins to set in and doubt rears its ugly head. The back stretch turn nears like a large stone wall. Will you make it through?
4. Home stretch – You’ve made it through tough times and you can see the finish line ahead. This is where the true winners excel. This is where speed counts! To you have what it takes to sprint with vigor to the finish line, or do you falter and stumble across in last place? Do you cross that finish line of love with your head high, or do you sneak through ashamed of your finish?
Relationships in a sense are very much like a horse race. The speed of the relationship is only indication of the quality relationship you are building. Making it across the finish line proves you finished the race. Rushing into a relationship and marriage, doesn’t guarantee you have a good one.
It is human nature to belong to someone. Most people desire to be in a relationship and many want to be married. The main thing to remember, reaching the finish line of marriage is not the answer. The answer is who you cross the finish line with that guarantees your happiness.
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